Why adults date other marrieds?
Chat about a loaded issue that no one wants to chat about, that’s it. Amusing thing, married dating have been going on from ancient times. Extramarital relationships can be fraught with evils, cause heartache, and other problems. Also you have to wrap your maind around all the other issues, there’s that truth and honesty matter, money, age difference, faith background, remorse, and on and on. I anticipate there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the purpose of this article I shall classify an affair as a long term, maybe years long relationship of a sexual nature between two individuals of whom one or both are married to other persons, lonely wife looks for dating.
Why do men have extramarital affairs? There are as many reasons as there are seek affairs. I am conserned mainly though it is just the human nature, the need for liking, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and cherished. Here are a few explanations I have run across.
Naturally we as humans are all sexual beings. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is pleasing and exciting, and sex makes us flee the real world for a brief period of time. This ecstasy exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels elevated enough. Somebody can switch the craving on and off, some are excellent at controlling it and others are so-so at best. But we all have it, young and mature, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the exhilaration of the hunt. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the love for another being, for some it is the wish to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the entire romance thing. These wishes and yearnings can be so strong they prevail over the taboos humanity has erected against extramarital affairs. For lots of individuals the yearnings will beat their worries and make them risk the rage of not only their family, but the public also. So why, what is the method?
Sex Addicts, perhaps some of us are. Sex is awfully good, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of physically driven sex addicts and can find away to have an affair and not injure your family or anybody else? You would need to reduce the threat you are taking. If you have the approach that a good affair is one that is advantageous to all, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I suppose this is the largest group, huge actually. There are many couples whose marriage is over, apart from they feel happy in the manner they exist, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your spouse but there is no romance. Also there are the kids to think about. Your savings are so knotted. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to be as a family besides love and sex.
Bodily reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical reasons that prevent them completing the sex performance, at least not with their spouse. An affair from time to time solves the trouble while keeping the marriage undamaged.
Avoidance, sorrowfully this is a ordinary cause I fear. One or the other, usually the man is sexually neglecting his female for a multitude of reasons. As a male I actually appreciate you guys neglecting your girls and making them available to us males of romance, making them “lonely wives” Though I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Also there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not just neglectful, but evil.
Something is just omitted in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Perhaps its romance that is missing, could be it is a lack of love, could be compassion is not here, maybe it is the closeness, maybe neglect. Maybe we have just developed distantly, our ordinary interests diverged. Maybe it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my life, is diverce of what you want. Could be I simply don’t know what I want from the marriage anymore. Maybe, just maybe I miss that sensation that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The first reason people give is, they seek the excitement that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to get away, for economic gain, for payback and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.
Tags: affairs, Dating, dating married people, extramarital affairs, Marriage, married dating, seeking an affair